I started writing this Quizzlet over a month ago, so if you see one of your old questions – you’ll know why. Shall we do another “live” Quizzlet this week, kids? I certainly hope so. Please enter your questions – silly or serious – in the comments below, and be sure to come back later to answer everyone’s queries your damn self. This has become my favorite post of the week. Help a brother out.
Appetizer: If you could change anything physical about yourself to become as attractive as you want, but it would take 5 years off your life, would you do it? – Lauren N.
Absolutely not. I like myself. Considering having my hairline restored a wee bit, but why waste 5 years when you can have it done for about $2,000? I have friends who’ve had a little follicle-fiddling done and it looks great in every case. Send money, guys, and I won’t name names. Might take it a step further and get myself a proper Eddie Munster widow’s peak. Or maybe just a perma-bowlcut. The possibilities are endless. My hair experience is kinda weird. About 5 years ago I started losing it at an alarming rate, and it scared the hell out of me. Then it stopped as suddenly as it began and I haven’t lost any since. Further proof that huffing turpentine is actually bad for you, and I’m glad I finally kicked the habit.
Soup: Last year, you were all over the new Indiana Jones movie. What movie are you looking forward to the most this summer? – John B.
That’s an easy one, Barkster – James Cameron’s Avatar. Jimmy comes out of hiding once every decade to make a classic – Aliens, T2, The Abyss, some silly flick about a big boat, etc. And by “hiding” I mean he’s usually developing some ground-breaking film technique – in this case he’s reviving 3D by all accounts. Here’s the flick’s synopsis…
Avatar is the story of a wounded ex-marine, thrust unwillingly into an effort to settle and exploit an exotic planet rich in bio-diversity, who eventually crosses over to lead the indigenous race in a battle for survival.
I heard 3 other amazing (to me) pieces of movie news this week which deserve their own post. Look for it next week, but I will say it involves a master, a
commander, an alien and an archaeologist.
Salad: What is your favorite and worst TV advert in living memory? – Jason C.
I’ve been looking for an excuse to mention this old Atari ad featuring PITF favorite, the late Phil Hartman. Activision’s cleverly named “Ice Hockey” game was released in 1981 and Hartman plays a very excited and anticipatory consumer.
I’ll never stop missing this guy.
As for least favorite commercials, although I know Arnold‘s campaign was a big success for Vonage, if I never hear that frigging “Woo Hoo” song by the 5, 6, 7, 8’s again – it will be too soon.
Main Course: If you could ask Shane MacGowan one question, eat one meal with him and share one woman with him, who/what would it be? – Kate L.
This is a cool question. A bit twisted, but creative. I would love to ask him where he was, what he was doing and how he felt the day Kristy MacColl was killed. The meal we shared would have to be either a) traditional Irish (I’m thinking corned beef and cabbage, maybe a nice boxty) or b) pureed and sucked through a straw due to his unfortunate dental situation. The woman would also have to be Irish – proper Irish and not simply of aul sod descent. And that woman would undoubtedly be Samantha Mumba. I’m sure you’ll agree, there’s never been a more Irish looking woman.
Dessert: You’ve championed SNL for years, and I know you collect and watch every show from every season. What was your favorite skit of 2008/2009? – Johnny Utah
Even though it was the strongest (and longest due to a writer’s strike-related extended season) season in years, I didn’t even have to think about this one. It was the Lawrence Welk Show skit from the Will Ferrell-hosted season finale which aired on May 16th. The Finger Lake Sisters were first seen earlier in the season when Anne Hathaway hosted. I still break out in hysterical laughter, after many repeated viewings, when the ridiculous “punchline” is finally revealed. Ferrell’s reactions and facial expressions will kill you.
I like potatoes and I like meat. I like standing on the corner of a street…
Here’s a page (only available if you’re in the USA due to Hulu’s licensing restrictions) where you can watch the whole episode which also included a cameo-heavy Celebrity Jeopardy, a hilarious funeral skit and another cameo-rich rendition of Billy Joel’s “Goodnight Saigon”. SNL is back, baby. Super-strong writing, the best collective cast since the late 90s and a deserved ratings renaissance to boot.
homo
You never fail to… disappoint, JV.