Bye Bye Brando: Marlon’s Ashes Scattered.

“One of the reasons Brando was a great star was that he never followed the form book, but lived his life spontaneously, personally and sincerely.” – Roger Ebert

When Marlon Brando died July 1st 2004 at 80 years of age, I had not yet crossed over into bloggerdom. His ashes were scattered today – half in Death Valley California and the other half on the Tahitian island he bought in 1962 (insert blizzard joke here). So I wanted to take this opportunity to mark the occasion.

Here’s what must be amazing about being an enormous (no pun intended – Marlon was still fairly fit in the 60s) celebrity. You can do the most outrageous, impulsive things. Marlon filmed Mutiny on the Bounty on the island, called Tetiaroa, in 1962. After principal photography wrapped, he married one of his co-stars (Tarita Teriipaia) – and then bought the island.

“Me filmy. Me likey. Me stayey. I’ll take the tanned broad, too.”

I’ll miss Marlon. He is first on a very short list of actors who defined the artform. Up until his death, he was giving in-house (and I mean his house – which he never left, ever) acting lessons to established A-listers like Sean Penn and Nick Nolte. The list of restaurants that would permit Marlon to partake of their all-you-can-eat-buffet is probably… also… very… short. Sigh.

That’s what you refer to as a “low-hanging fruit” joke. But Brando was into humor at its most very basic – flatulence – so he’d probably let me get away with it. Have a safe trip on that last Streetcar, Stanley. You’re the best that ever was.