During University of Guelph summer holidays, Gazza, JV and I used to wash windows in Oakville, Ontario. We’d get up at 5:30 and usually work through until 7 or 8 at night. Long hours, but $600+ a week was a fortune to a student, and we’d usually get to take the entire month of August off. Those two summers were hectic – there were good experiences and bad experiences on the job. We once washed a house made entirely out of glass which was pretty cool. But then there was the time we were scrubbing siding with TSP and paint chips began to flake off like confetti. They clogged a storm drain and then flooded a very nice lady’s finished basement. That went over like a belch in church.
My point being, summer jobs in O-Town can be stressful – but never once did I consider mutilating a co-worker (alright, so maybe there was that one time Gary yelled at me after I shattered a toilet tank by dropping a window pane on it). Apparently times have changed. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that the Jesus Chainsaw Massacre DVD has now outsold Return of the King. Even the church is getting into torture and dismemberment. Gratuitous violence seems to be the order of the day, and in Oakville – it was yesterday.
Long story short (I have real work to do) crew of landscapers are working at a job site at Lakeshore and Navy Street near Sharkey’s. Female landscaper makes comment to male landscaper who also happens to be doing treework with a loud, smoking Husqvarna. Male landscaper loses his sheehiznit and buries chainsaw in female landscaper’s back. Read it for yourself here.
I also find it odd that Gazza submitted this story, and was recently photographed with the chainsaw man himself, Leatherface. And by odd I mean really disturbing.
Your facts may be a little overstated – the man didn’t bury the chainsaw in the woman’s back – she in fact suffered only minor injuries, some of which were from a fall that was a result of him chasing her. It wasn’t exactly the Chainsaw Massacre, however it was disturbing all the same.
-Dee
(Oakville resident)
Thanks for the input, Dee. You’re absolutely right, but minor injuries just aren’t as funny as grevious bodily harm. You know what else isn’t funny? I heard they’re turning Sharky’s into condos. Bummer. Now I’ll have to go to Philthy McNasty’s when I visit Oakville. Or is that gone too?
Hey Dave,
Well, there’s still controversy over what Sharky’s will become. As far as I know, the condo plan was denied by the town because it would be too much of an eyesore in the downtown area. Then talk was of erecting some sort of a 6-storey building that would include a restaurant. It’s hard to keep up with what’s going on.
Philthy McNasty’s is still alive and well (as far as i know). Haven’t been there in ages it seems. When i was in school, we usually spent our time carousing the Burlington bars – they were generally better. We used to hang out at Emma’s Back Porch a lot. Mind you, that was 5 or 6 years ago, so i’m not really sure if that’s still the ‘happenin’ place.
-Dee (from Oakville)
LOVE Emma’s Back Porch. Still go there the odd time when I’m visiting the area. My friend Gazza lives about a block away. I love the fires they light out on the back deck and the weird way the bar is laid out. I feel like I’m in the Swiss Family Robinson treehouse at Disneyland half the time. The other half? Drunk as fuck.